It’s different, but a blessing

HAPPY THANKSGIVING everyone!

The holidays are when I feel the most home sick here. Today has been different. It’s different to wake up 5 feet off the ground admiring your blanket on the ground, it’s different hearing the first ‘Happy Thanksgiving’ come from your good German friend, it’s different to see boys go out and celebrate the strike of midnight on this holiday by mud sliding on the futbol pitch, it’s different to see hail, it’s different to be rehearsing for a dance lesson you will be hosting for international students come Saturday, it’s different to go to class, it’s different to search every room of a castle, and even more different to never smell the amazing aroma this day brings, it’s different not being able to hug your mother, it’s different not having a television much less an interest in watching the Cowboys with your dad. It’s different to be on the other side of the pond this time with your brother and not friends, it’s different receiving a care package from your sister on this day when all you wanted was her to be inside. It’s all different and yet I still feel at home.

The kitchen staff did an amazing job tonight making our thanksgiving feast as much a feast as they could. The tables were ordained with fall leaf confetti, tea candles, flowers, and festive napkins wrapped as turkeys. We enjoyed turkey, gravy, dinner rolls, cranberry sauce, green bean casserole…and for some reason rice. Don’t ask.

I want to thank each and every one of you for your friendship, support, prayers, and love. While I am not physically home to show my love I do wish you all a joyous day. Don’t forget to count your blessings. Start with your family if you struggle to begin.

I’m so thankful for my mother, my father, and my sister Manny!

A Faithful Rock In Christ Almighty

As part of the curriculum here at Capernwray every student must go on a 10-day Outreach, in small groups, to churches primarily in England. One group of students has the opportunity of going on a 14-day Outreach to Kenya, Africa during that same time.

I have had a desire to go to Africa for several years now and upon arriving to Capernwray the first evening I actually ate dinner with the Outreach coordinator, Carolyn, without initially realizing it. She mentioned the Africa opportunity that night and said we would all be receiving information later in October about it. Well I attended that information meeting and learned a bit more about the missions trip and left there seriously thinking about the opportunity. I prayed about it for a couple of days and then picked up an application because they could only take 10 students. I filled out the application and turned it in knowing that if Africa was where God wanted me then I would be chosen.

Just recently, during announcements, 10 students were called into the backroom of the conference hall and my name happened to be one of the 10. We all fit snugly into that small room and as the door closed I counted the other faces in the room and immediately felt my heart begin to race as the word ‘Africa’ almost fell out of my mouth. I immediately felt like I do before exams; my hands become clammy, my face gets hot, and my stomach feels empty. What seemed like an eternity passed and then Charity, the RA, announced we were all chosen to go to Africa!!!! Now I know most of you could have guessed that well before I said it but being in the moment and not knowing whom all applied I was in shock. All I could say is, ‘Thank you Lord.’

The last few days have been realization days. What was once a dream that seemed so far fetched, if I was honest with myself, was now a reality only months away! I will keep you updated as I learn more about the trip but I have confirmed my place on the team.

Is this for real?

God has a real sense of humor

I was speaking to Kinsley, a friend of mine here, this past Sunday evening about my greatest fear. I don't fear dying or if I will get married as I have come to terms with both of these common 'fears' and feel a great sense of comfort with them. On the other hand, I must say I have not come to terms or felt as great sense of comfort when it comes to public speaking. This is my greatest fear. Even now, as I talk about speaking in public, I find my stomach beginning to turn. It's the same feeling I get when I am being thrown about on a roller coaster and my stomach goes into meltdown.

I have learned that whenever my name is called during afternoon announcements that God has a challenging opportunity for me in the very near future. I was asked by the dean of students on Monday to preach Sunday, November 29^th during the morning service at a local church. My first reaction was ‘there is NO way!’ Did God not hear me the night before talk about how terrified I am to speak in public? He did hear me and that is why I was asked to preach.

But then I think about the fact that I have qualifications. I sweat when I am in a small group and everyone has their heads bowed and I am praying out loud. What never-before-seen physical reaction is my body going to endure when I am standing behind a pulpit looking out at 50 wide-eyed and bushy tailed people staring right back at me? Let me die now is my physical reaction.

As I sit here typing, I have no idea what topic I am going to speak on. Maybe it will be on how even the most unqualified people are used for God’s glory. Nevertheless, this whole experience is not for my glory but for God’s. He has given me an amazing opportunity and I must act upon it faithfully.

Make sure the next time you express your greatest fear, you are prepared to face it.

Guy Fawkes Day

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,

The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,

I know of no reason

Why the Gunpowder Treason

Should ever be forgot.

For anyone not from England, this past Thursday, Nov 5 was Guy Fawkes Day. This day is not a national holiday in the sense that no working individual gets a day off, but none-the-less the Brits celebrate it as such. The celebration is quite ironic as Guy Fawkes was one of a group of Roman Catholic restorationists from England who planned to displace Protestant rule by blowing up the Houses of Parliament while King James I and the nobility were inside. Guy Fawkes and his conspirators saw this as a necessary reaction to the systematic discrimination against English Catholics. The Gunpowder Plot’s execution failed due to Parliament receiving an anonymous warning letter in the early hours of Nov 5^th, 1605 thereby catching Guy Fawkes in the act.

In celebration of this evening, the International Café outreach I am apart of went to the Lancaster Castle to watch the fireworks. It was a typical English night, which simply means it was raining. There wasn’t a light drizzle but rather a torrential downpour. But unlike Colorado, the rain had no effect on the Brits determination to make the fireworks show continue. I felt like such a foreigner as three Americans fought to stay dry under an umbrella made for one.

I must admit that the show was really good. I have never been that close to fireworks before and, as is British tradition, you must accompany the show with music, I found the whole experience much better than the celebration of the 4^th of July. I can’t believe I just said that but I think my fondness of this country is becoming greater and greater each day. Of course my patronage is still with the USA so hold your drawers.

It is in Silence when we Hear the Most

I think we can all agree that if we were given one word to describe our day-to-day lives we would say: busy. Have you ever heard someone say, “I don’t have time to do ____”? It is such an excuse when you realize you are awake on average 16 hours a day. It’s not that we don’t have time for something but rather we don’t place a priority on that which we ‘don’t have time to do.’ This reality became so apparent to me in light of the ‘electronics fast’ we observed leading up to the day of prayer this past week. I have never made time to just be quiet for an extended period of time and just reflect on my life and pray. I seem to avoid these times because I think it is in these quiet times of reflection that we must face our failures and to be honest no one wants to do that. The problem is if we never admit our downfalls or shortcomings how are we to move on and grow from them? I found myself doing just this on our day of prayer and afterwards feeling such a sense of relief and almost a new person. The experience was so amazing. I would encourage each and every one of you to take that quiet time each day and just reflect and come to terms with your failures because failing to do so makes messy situations even messier.

where I am Supposed to be

The trip to Edinburgh was nothing shy of fulfilling. It was great to get off the grounds of Capernwray and explore a large city in Scotland. While I didn’t get to play golf at St. Andrews I did find myself peering off the top of the Edinburgh castle, the one Bill Gates rents out for a summer home, in view of the North Sea.

Halloween was a very different experience. Michael and I found ourselves wanting to do something different but all we saw were people dressed up in very different costumes. Nonetheless, we had a lot of fun running figure eights hand-in-hand down the main street. I never thought I would say this but I missed my bed at Capernwray and Michael and I both found ourselves on separate occasions calling Capernwray home. I don’t know if I was simply being nieve to the idea of actually becoming settled in to this place but I really feel a sense of comfort here. It is as if I am where I am supposed to be. For those that don’t know, this feeling is such a blessing to me because I have never known what I am to be doing with my life currently and if what I am doing is right. It is here where God wants me.

After everyone had gotten back from their weekend away we all met in the only room that had internet because most of us had been ‘deprived’ of it all weekend, and we only had limited time left before we would be cut off until this Saturday, today. It had only been three days away from each other and everyone acted as though they were reuniting with their long lost brother. I can confidently say we all quickly realized that night how close everyone is after only one month of being here. I know this ‘family’ we have all quickly taken to, if we swallow fully, is going to taste bittersweet come March when many of us head to Austria for spring school. But before I begin to draw anymore sappy, and if I am honest, rubbish analogies I will simply move on.

Speaking of Austria, Michael and I have decided that we will in fact be going to Tauernhof, Austria for spring semester. I have heard from a myriad of people who did just what we are planning to do and said they absolutely loved it! I am excited for many reasons but one that hits closest to my bon-appetit heart is the food at Tauernhof is supposed to be better! Not hard right? But better as in good enough that they sell a cookbook of all the recipes for the dishes they serve throughout the term. The location and scenery will not only be a change of pace but the style of teaching will change as well. Capernwray takes a more logical and conservative approach to Scripture whereas Tauernhof takes a more practical and charismatic approach. I think both are vital for a well-rounded experience and Michael and I feel that is where God wants us.